Cookies
by QueenXxIceXxCat
Summary: Soifon eats Yoruichi's cookies, what will Yoruichi do when she finds out? A/U oocness on Soifon's part. one-shot


**.Cat.94: hello and welcome to my new one shot**

**Yoruichi: I think they'll enjoy it**

**.Cat.94: I do too I hope it'll make everyone laugh, would you mind doing the disclaimers my dear kitty friend**

**Yoruichi: of course, Captain blue kitty does not own bleach or me**

**.Cat.94: please enjoy.**

Doomed. That was the only word that described Soifon's current situation, she was doomed. She didn't see the note next to the plate of chocolate chip cookies that said **Property of Yoruichi**; well she didn't until after she had eaten them all! Soifon knew what happened to anyone who ate Yoruichi's cookies and it was never good. But beginning Yoruichi's girlfriend exempted her from that right? A moment passed and Soifon groaned,

"She's gonna kill me" Soifon knew that Yoruichi was a woman who loved her food and cookies were no exception. So Soifon had to think of a way to get away fast enough before Yoruichi returned from work. Soifon glanced at her wall clock that hung in the kitchen where she was currently standing and it read 6:45 pm, in roman numerals. Soifon paled, she only had five minutes; so instead of running she decided to do one of the two options. One, wait for Yoruichi to walk in the door and face her consequences like the adult she was. Or two, run and hide. After a quick moment of analysis Soifon decided to go with option two and hide in the one place Yoruichi never set foot in. The laundry room, yes it was perfect! Yoruichi would never look for Soifon there so she sprinted into the laundry room and buried herself under a comforter and a medium sized pile of dirty clothes.

"Perfect, I should be safe for now" Soifon said with a voice of victory. Then suddenly she heard the front door open and cheery voice yell

"Little Bee, I'm home" Soifon quickly shrank under her camouflage and began still. She didn't want to notify Yoruichi she was in their apartment.

"Little Bee?" Yoruichi called again, not hearing an answer she began to talk to herself.

"Weird, Soifon doesn't have to work today, I wonder where she could be" as she mused on her thoughts Yoruichi walked into the kitchen to get a light snack. Luckily for her she had made a nice batch of chocolate chip cookies that morning. Smiling at the thought of eating a cookie Yoruichi looked for the platter she had set them on.

"Weird, I could've sworn I. . ." Yoruichi's eyes landed on the plate she had the cookies on earlier and saw nothing but crumbs and her little note saying the cookies were hers. She glared; who could've taken all her cookies, the only one home was Soifon. Then the light bulb went off in her head. Soifon not being home plus Yoruichi's cookies being gone equaled one of three solutions. One Soi had eaten her cookies and ran away. Two Soifon ate her cookies and hid somewhere. Or three the cookies had grown legs and escaped, so Soifon went after them. Now being the smart woman she was Yoruichi had remembered in the past that Soifon had done this before and hid. So option two seemed appropriate, looking around the quiet apartment an idea had crept into Yoruichi's head.

"Oh Soifon darling" Yoruichi called sweetly. Back in the laundry room Soifon was praying that she wouldn't be found. And when she her Yoruichi call her again she began to pray faster.

"Please don't let her find me, please don't let her find me" Soifon chanted in a whispering voice.

"Soifon, I know what you did, and if you come out now I won't punish you too severely" Yoruichi said but Soifon didn't dare answer. So, Yoruichi thought, she wants to play hide and seek huh?

"More fun for me" Yoruichi said as she began to search their apartment.

"Oh Soifon, you shouldn't hide from me, you know I'm going to find you" Yoruichi purred as she looked around the living room. She checked behind and under the couch, no Soifon. Then she checked in between the curtains, no Soifon there either.

"So she's found a new spot, clever little bee" Yoruichi thought as she ventured out of the living room and into the hall that lead to four different rooms. The first lead to the bathroom, the second was, the laundry room; Yoruichi shuddered; she hated the laundry room. Next, was the linen closet and finally the bedroom, which was Yoruichi's favorite room other than the living room since she could sleep on the couch whenever she felt like it.

"Oh where, oh where is my little Soifon, oh where, oh where could she be" Yoruichi sang as she entered the bathroom although there wasn't much places to hide in a bathroom in general, except for the shower or under sink.

"She's small enough to fit" Yoruichi mumbled as she looked at the sink cabinets. And as she searched the bathroom Soifon was pondering on whether or not she should make a run for it. She heard Yoruichi go into the bathroom so if she wanted to run, now was the time to do it.

"Maybe I should consider a new hideout" Soifon whispered to herself. As she started to rise she heard Yoruichi call,

"Soifon, I know you're around here somewhere, and when I find you, your_ punishment_ will be waiting" immediately Soifon hit the floor again and waited for Yoruichi's sounding footsteps to cease.

"It sounds like she went to our room" Soifon said quietly. Then she smiled,

"Now's my chance to go" she quickly got up and quietly made her way to the door. She tried to open it as quietly as possible, and then she peered around the hall. No Yoruichi in sight. This was her golden opportunity. So after looking around once more, Soifon quietly but quickly made her way to the front door.

"I'm gonna make it" Soifon squealed excitedly in her head as she came close to her gateway of freedom. And as soon as she touched the door knob, Yoruichi sprang out from the hallway entrance and yelled,

"AHA I got you, thought you could pull a fast one on me huh" Soifon looked at Yoruichi,

"Ah, Yoruichi your home, how was your day" Yoruichi smirked at Soifon; she looked like a deer caught in headlights. But since Soifon wanted to play this game; Yoruichi decided to go along with it.

"Oh it was fine, got some new clients for my boss, had a slight argument with Byakuya about something, I can't remember but it wasn't important. But I really missed you Soi Bee" Yoruichi smiled. And this made Soifon scared.

"Oh really, oh well I'm glad you had a nice day, I'd love to hear more but I have to run to the store real fast" Soifon said as she opened the door to hopefully leave, but it was quickly closed by Yoruichi's long slender arm.

"Oh must you go now, I was hoping to share a quick snack with you" Yoruichi said with an adorable pout. Soifon blushed at the cute facial expression, but she had to fight it, that is; if she wanted to see tomorrow.

"That's very sweet of you Yoruichi but this is an emergency run" Soifon said trying to pull the door open. But still, it wouldn't budge.

"Oh really, what do you need to get that's so important" Yoruichi asked as a grin began to play around her lips. Soifon thought for moment, and Yoruichi saw the panic run through Soifon's face.

"I've almost got her" Yoruichi thought wickedly as Soifon finally came up with an item.

"Um, were out of milk" Soifon said quickly. Yoruichi blinked confused.

"Really, let me check" then Yoruichi turned around, and as soon as she did Soifon opened the door and ran for it. Yoruichi turned around and smirked,

"Clever little bee" then she took off after her.

"I'm free" Soifon yelled as she bolted for the elevator, she couldn't believe it; she was actually going to get away with it. Well she thought so until she looked over her shoulder and her eyes widened in fear. Yoruichi was a few feet behind her and catching up fast.

"Aw crap" Soifon whimpered as she picked up her pace. She was only a few feet away from the elevator and luckily someone was walking into it.

"Hold it open please" Soifon called and the person turned around and nodded. Soifon looked over her shoulder and Yoruichi was almost behind her so she literally dove for the elevator. But before she could reach, Yoruichi caught her.

"So you ate my cookies then huh" Yoruichi said with teasing feral grin.

"No I didn't, uh Kisuke came over today and ate them" Soifon said hurriedly as she tried to wriggle free of Yoruichi's iron grip. Yoruichi laughed at her attempt of a lie.

"Nice try bee, Kisuke is sick with the flu" Soifon shifted her eyes to try to get out dangers way, but nothing came to mind.

"Well Soifon, since you ate my cookies, hide from me, tried to run and blamed a sick man for your actions; punishment is in order" Yoruichi said as she turned around, with Soifon in her arms, before heading back to their apartment. For what seemed like the millionth time today, Soifon's face paled. Whenever the word punishment fell out of Yoruichi's mouth, it wasn't always bad, but since this was about cookies, Soifon's punishment might be a severe one.

"No Yoruichi please, I didn't see the note I swear" Soifon begged as they entered the residence.

"I'm sorry baby bee but you still did it, and discipline is needed" Yoruichi said with a wide grin. Soifon began to struggle again, but still Yoruichi's strength held true.

"I think you need a talk with Mr. Tickles" Yoruichi said as she entered there room and pushed Soifon onto their bed. Soifon protested loudly, she didn't like Mr. Tickles at all! Yoruichi smiled at her trembling bee just before she began to tickle Soifon. Soifon squealed loudly as she tried to roll away, but Yoruichi used her legs to hold her down.

"I-I-I'm s-so-sorry" Soifon laughed breathlessly and Yoruichi smiled. She enjoyed seeing her bee smile even when she was being tickle tortured.

"P-Please stop" Soifon giggled before busting out in laughter, her sides were starting to hurt and she was flushed with a bright red dust across her face. After about ten minutes of endless tickling Soifon was ready to pass out she was so out of breath.

"I can't breathe" Soifon panted as Yoruichi let up.

"Well, if you can't breathe then I should let you up, but with a price" Yoruichi said.

"Anything, just please let me go" Soifon said as her air supply began to fill up again.

"Well I only have one request" Yoruichi said and Soifon stared at her waiting for her to continue.

"All I want you to do is make me some chocolate chip cookies to replace the ones you ate" Yoruichi stated and Soifon sighed quietly with relief; she thought she would have to do something else.

"I can handle that" Soifon said.

"But, while you make the cookies, you have to wear that maid outfit I bought you last year" Yoruichi said with a Cheshire grin. Soifon gave her a look of outrage, but then she sighed, she knew it was only fair.

"Oh Soifon" Yoruichi called from the living room,

"I think the cookies have cookies have cooled down enough, would you bring me one" there was a grumbling noise coming from the kitchen before Soifon stepped out. She was wearing a black frilly maid outfit that had a large open V-neck and had a white apron and a large white ribbon that tied in the back.

The dress all together fell just at her mid thigh, but her legs were covered in white thigh high stockings that had little black bows on either side of the ankle and thigh. And to top it all off she had black kitty ears, paws and a tail that had had a pink bow on the end.

"Aw, I cute kitty, did you bring me a snack, how thoughtful" Yoruichi purred sweetly, and Soifon rolled her eyes as she offered Yoruichi a cookie from a plate.

"I have a request my dear kitten" Yoruichi said as Soifon looked at her expectantly. Yoruichi put half the cookie in her mouth and said

"Share this with me" Soifon blushed slightly at the request, but didn't refuse, so she leaned down and bit the other half. And just as she was about to pull away Yoruichi pulled her back down and kissed her sweetly.

"I love cookies" Soifon thought as she wrapped her arms around her dear Yoruichi.

**.Cat.94: well I hope you all enjoyed the story and got a good laugh as well**

**Yoruichi: I got more than that!**

**Soifon: *glares at blue kitty* if you ever put me in a dress again I swear I'll sting you with Suzumebachi**

**.Cat.94: promises, promises any who, please review!**

**Soifon and Yoruichi: Bye **


End file.
